DAVIEPEDIA

 

Well other folks have wikipedia and since then a load of other 'pedia's have shown up so I thought, "Why not?" The cat answered "Mainly to secure things!" and so here it is, the factualish pedia of Dave.

Please note that truth is often stretched, twisted or ignored - otherwise you could have used an encyclopedia and a dictionary. Who said facts had to be the truth or truth be fact?

Incidently the cat is black, has yellow eyes that can open twice as wide as any other cats and are sometimes green, catches sqirrels and is called Neo. This has no bearing on the following but is nice to know.

A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O, P, Q, R, S, T, U, V, W, X, Y, Z.

A
Advertising - Possibly the greatest contributor to the worlds current social ills. It should be a means of informing people truthfully about a product. It is the art of selling products. It thus creates a desire for a product if it can or cannot be afforded. It thus peddles misery and frustration.
Affray - An unarmed fight invoving a few people and absolutely nothing to do with cloth coming apart.
Alley - Most folk know what an alley is - or do they? An alley is simply a narrow "lane" or "way" that people can walk along to get from one place to another. Before the industrial age it was applied to many a shortish path connecting two points folk might want to go between. By its nature an alley cannot help but be between things and with the coming of the industrial age was often a narrow path between buildings that usually gave access to the rear yards. This is how most folk think of them nowadays. They are often the scenes of dark deeds or a place where young lovers kiss.
Antimacassar - Chair protector - Cloth that goes over the back and arms of a chair to prevent staining. Not one that is against the Scottish clan of Macassar for, as far as I know such a clan does not exist.
Apple - A favorite fruit that grows on Apple Trees. Is New York called The Big Apple because it has seedy bits or is it something to do with Macintosh?
Architype - Perfect specimen.
Awl - piercing tool - can be large and just pointed but is usually shaped like a drill bit in some way; Bradawl is a small pointed tool used to make holes.
Axle - Something the road wheels turn on on a vehicle and a word that somehow confuses kids idea of what Axis means!
Axis - a way of describing a unification of enemy states but only applied if they lose. Of far more interest is the other meaning used in rotation in 3D geometry. If you don't understand the next sentence then read the bit about co-ordinates, below, then come back to it. The straight line that goes through the origin and the x co-ordinate is called the x axis. Likewise the one that goes through the origin and the y co-ordinate is called the Y axis and the one through the origin and the z co-ordinate the z axis. The x, y and z axis are always at right angles to each other. objects can be rotated around these axis like a wheel rotates around an axel. I will use an example to describe the rotation: Imagine a six foot figure laying on the ground with their head towards you. Now imagine that figure floats up 3 feet so they still have their head towards you and are parallel to the ground. Now let us say that the figures origin is at their centre. If we rotate it through 90 degrees around its x axis it will either be standing up or standing on its head. We will say it is standing up and now rotate it clockwise through another ninety degrees around the y axis so it is looking to the left. Now if we rotate it 180 degrees around its z axis it will be on its head and looking to the right. All of this assumes that the other axis do NOT rotate with the figure. If they did rotate with the figure after the first 90 degree rotation around the x axis the y and the z axis would have swapped positions so 90 degrees clockwise around the y axis would have the figure on its side facing you but now the z and the x have swapped positions so the 180 degree rotation would have the figure still on its side but with its back to you. Different 3D computing packages use one or other of these rotation methods and often different ways of placing the origin. All of this is only of use if you are doing 3D work like I have. Now see that all of this rotating around an axis is like a wheel rotating around an axle. Maybe the 'ax' bit means to turn or rotate around so where does this leave the axe?
B
Baby - a tube with a noise at one end and a mess at the other. Kind of describes the universe - started with a big bang and now look at us!
Beauty - this is in the eye of the beholder (a phrase that takes on a whole new meaning in AD&D). In other words, if anyone tries to define beauty, they are wrong! In my years of growing up I have discovered a few things and one is that beauty does not equal sexy just as love and lust can be separate things.
Black - a lack of colour - all of this text is black.
Blossom - The flower of the apple tree (and pear tree and possibly others). As a compliment for ladies used to mean rosey and well rounded (curvacious).
Blue - a colour - a prime colour in fact. For some reason associated with porn and boys as well as calm and healing. We humans are mad! This is Blue!
B Movie - When one went to the pictures back from before the 50's through to at least 70's, the audience generally enjoyed a program consisting of a B movie, advertising with or without a short film, trailers and finally the main feature or A movie. B movies tended to be around an hour long, were made on a restricted budged and invariably completely different from the main feature. Oh yes! Someone usually sold ice creams just after the B movie and you had time to eat it during the advertising.
Boffin - Informal name for a scientific expert or technician.
Bookworm - A person who spends most of their spare time reading books. They are very often quite capable of social interraction but just choose not to.
Buck - A young male deer and a nickneme for an American dollar. Also the nickname for a young man who dates many a lass.
Buff - Informal name for an expert also used in getting expert knowledge: "He buffed up on this!"
Bung - A stopper, i.e. an object that will seal a tube shape, like a pipe or bottleneck. A cork for a bottle is a bung. From this came the verb to bung (up), e.g. to bung up a hole meaning to seal up a hole. The verb widened the use of it to virtually filling or sealing any gap or hole and somewhere along the way, probably via, 'bung that cork in there' type of usage, came to also be used for throw, e.g. Bung those boxes up to me.
HOME
C
Cabin - a detatched chalet made of wood on land. Accomodation on a vessel. A sea going hotel room.
Celeb - a word made up to describe celebrities that do not deserve the status. Any TV show that features celebs should be avoided at all costs.
Chamber Pot - A handy receptical for urine that up until the mid sixties many folk would have under the bed. Cold nights, outside toilets and no central heating made this almost a must. Some had lids but most did not. Nowadays used by old people and in prisons as well as the 'training pot' used for toilet training. Also known as a poe or a potty.
Codswallop - Nonsense - Suggests untrue.
Co-ordinates - figures representing position in measurements of distance from an origin. The origin is where all of the co-ordinates have the value of zero. In 3D, three co-ordinates are needed to define a position along with knowing where the origin is and what unit of distance measurement is being used. Traditionally we describe these as the x, y, z co-ordinates where x gives the side by side value, y the up and down one and z the forward and back one.
Creek - Tidal part of a river meeting the sea. Usually quite muddy and as the flow of river water slows here with quite a bit of rubbish washed down by the river.
Cricket - a lethal bat and ball game. If you are batting someone hurls a heavy ball at you at speed and you try to thump it away with the bat where there are no fielders so that you can run to the other end of the pitch before the other side get it and throw it to where you are running to. If you are fielding you have to get in the way of and stop the ball that has just been thumped by the batsman, frequently accelerating it, without letting it hit the ground. The only time I did intercept the ball when fielding, I broke three fingers. I find the game boring to watch except when it is an aggro match played between village teams on a sunny day and it can be watched from under the shade of a tree just outside a pub.
D
Darn - A curse used instead of Damn! Something done to mend holes in socks. So if a person says "I am putting on my darned socks!" are they cursing or not?
Dave - Seemingly having forgotten that the meaning of "David" is "beloved", "Dave" - a shortened version of "David" has come to mean a rather boring person who often does things unconventionally - often those males of the Aquarius star sign. Oh! Me!
Daviepedia - My encyclopedia having facts and figures true at the time of going to press as well as jokes and lies (good luck) Question everything! Daviepedia should be pronounced day-vee-pee-dee-ah on every day except bank holidays when it is pronounced day-vee-ped-eee-ah. It must never be written DayVPDR! It does not do texts.
Dimension - A description of positioning within a bound environment. A zero dimensional environment is a point in a 'place' that has no depth, width or height. A one dimensional environment is a line. A two dimensional environment is the plane a line passes through also described as a defined by two lines intersecting. So far we have zero dimension that does not exist but does exist (read Zero below), the first dimension that is width (or height or depth or whatever depending upon from where it is looked at), the second dimension is area on a single plane - a flat dimension and now I am introducing the third dimension that has depth, width and height. If you can imagine this dimension as the area that bounds all positions within a single point of time, i.e. it is space. This neatly introduces time as the forth dimension, one that bounds all of space through every point in time. By assumption the world of Mayfest has two more dimensions which may or may not be valid in the real world. Interested? Read here!
DLR or Docklands Light Railway - An extremely punctual and efficient railway that runs from places like Lewisham, Stratford and Woolwhich into the City (of London), Bank or Tower Gateway stations. It has probably got bigger.
Duck - A bird and an action. One lays eggs and tastes good the other can be life saving. Occasionally the latter is used to avoid the flight of the former. Mayhap if the former did more of the latter we would not have as much of the former to taste.
E

Egg - Pre birth form of fishes, mammals and birds. A versatile food.
Encyclopediatric - Childlike knowledge, Knowledge suitable for a child or presented in a manner suitable for a child. Bits of my mind.
Encyclopediatrician - A person who sorts knowledge for children - some of these are editors for books like encyclopedias and others can be found among the teaching profession.
Eyewash - the type of nonsense that is an attempt to deceive somebody.
F
Fag - (1) Slang for a cigarette. (2) A junior at public school who has to 'serve' a senior. (3) A tiring task.
Festers - people that go to festivals. I owe this word to Jessica Fox-Taylor who, I think, thought of it and like me thinks it is funny.
Fish - Target of fishing. A scaley thing that swims around under water in a continual quest for food and occasional mating. While it does this it has to avoid all of the bigger fish that are doing exactly the same. "Fish eat fish!" a possible saying that accounts for the downfall of Loki-ism {Mayfest world}. "Fish!" Cry of a priest of Loki {Mayfest world}.
Fishing - as a sport it is more boring than golf. It is also a survival skill. Fortunately there are other methods to a rod and line to catch fish. These methods are not considered sport and some are illegal. Fishing is also applied to things other than fish. For example "fishing for information" which has extended to the word Phishing being used to describe the mass sending of emails that it is hoped someone will reply to so that their address can then be targeted for advertising.
Flour - only thing common with flower, which is said almost the same, is they both come from plants. It is the white powdery stuff that is not salt or sugar that is used to make bread and cakes.
Flower - The bit of the plant that makes it attractive and sexy to pollen gatherers. Has stamen with pollen on in the middle and surrounds this with brightly colored petals. When calling a woman a flower do be careful. In Britain in pre-Victorian era, calling a woman "flower" was telling them they were sexy and attractive (on heat as it were!). The Victorians managed to change this almost overnight to apply to little girls and mean as pretty as a flower. Both meanings apply out of this country - the latter in mainly ex British empire countries. In a few places it has become an insult that means a woman who is desperate to trap a man into marriage by getting him to father a baby in her.
Formula One - Grand Prix Motor Racing - One of my interests.
Fray, to - applied to cloth meaning to unravel a bit around the edges.
Freakonomics - Economics applied to everything and anything. The name of a book by Steven D. Levitt and Stephen J. Dubner.
Freya - Greater spirit followed by the Seamstresses Guild. {Mayfest World}
Fry - a cooking method that can be used to cook fish. This is not to be confused with Stephen Fry who is a man that can, presumably, cook fish as well as making the most boring of things sound interesting.
Funder - Amusing thunder or, more usually, someone that provides funds.
G
Gentel - French word meaning 'well born' and the word from which many of the following were derived. Please note that the order of the 'gent' entries will not be alphabetical as the meanings are better appreciated in the order they are given.
Gentlefolk - persons regaurded as being of good breeding.
Gentleman, Gent (short for gentleman), Gentlewoman - persons reguarded as having qualities of refinement associated with good families.
Gentilesse - the quality of good breeding and, sometimes, given to the quality of politeness.
Gentility - 1) respectability and polite good breeding, noble birth or ancestry 2) people of noble birth or ancestry.
Gentry - 1) People of high birth or social standing or of the aristocracy. 2) persons just below nobility in social ranking.
Compare those to:
Gentle - having a mild or kindly nature.
Genteel - respectable, polite and well bred.
Gentelism - a word or phrase used in place of a less gentle one.
Gents - a man's public toilet.
Gobbledigook - Nonsense - suggests garbled and so making no sense.
Going Blue with Cold - an inaccurate statement stil frequently used in England. It was based on pre Victorian concepts - The tops of mountains are cold. The lips of people that climbed up mountains often went blue. So the cold was blamed for this when in fact it was simply a lack of oxygen that caused the colour.
Going Green - 1: Turning a green color - maybe through bruising or going rotten. 2: Becoming jealous or envious. 3: Becoming aware of and acting upon environmental issues. Incidently an inexperienced person is often described as green.
Golf - Yawn! A sport taken at walking pace where people try to hit small balls into small holes some considerable distance away. Only slightly less boring than fishing.
Golf Club - 1: a stick used to hit the small balls in golf. It is also a handy weapon especially in games like Cthulhu. 2: A club associated with a golf course. Very often golf courses cannot be played upon unless the player is a member or the guest of a member.
Golf Course - Some say a waste of space in that it is only used to play golf on. They are wrong but I will not go into some of my teenage escapades! Because only a very tiny proportion of the population are wealthy enough to use a golf course the natural features remain pretty much unspoiled and so golf courses give the country some respite from even more estates!
Gormenghast - A castle that is a town and almost a country. It rambles over many miles and is ruled by tradition. Most of the people that live there are quite mad. It is featured in works of Melvin Peake. I feel quite at home there.
Gray - A series of shades between Black and White. For some reason associated with misery. Hey! I am much much much happier with gray than pink anyday! All of these are Gray!
Green - a colour - a secondary colour made by mixing the primes blue and yellow. For some reason associated with inexperience as well as greed and envy. More recently green is the name given to environmental issues. This is Green!
Grey - A common misspelling of "gray" and an English surname.
Guys Hospital - One of London's most famous hospitals. It's frontage featured in a lot of the Ealing studio 'Doctor' films. I was born there. It is within the sound of Bow Bells.
H
H - The goalposts of the alphabet.
Haar! - Not a variation on a piratical "Aaar!" but actually a North Sea mist. So if a pirate saw one and said "Aaar! Haar!" on understanding that he was looking at a North Sea mist, could that have been where "Ah! Ha!" (meaning "Now I know!") came from?
Ha! Hah! - Noises that along with "Hmmm!" and "Indeed!" make people sound as if they know what is going on.
Halloween - Midnight 31st October - When British people copy U.S. Americans, small children learn to beg, there are a lot of fancy dress parties, too many zombies, most little girls want to be pretty witches and very few people actually concern themselves with the dead. Somehow pumpkins have got in onto the act and young teen girls want to be anime cat girls.
Hamming it - a form of satire closed to vegitarians?
Hello - Welsh for Hello - I have a learn Welsh tape that spent at least five minutes teaching me that!
Home Page - The main or introductory page to a site. It should tell you what the site is about and link to an Index page if it is not one. The HOME takes you to this (Just as the Word Index takes you to the index for this section).
Honey - A great substance made by bees and pinched by men. It is then used to make other things like mead as well as being just Honey. When used as a term of endearment means, "sweetness" and many black folk whose families were fromthe West Indies use "Honey Chil'" (Honey Child) when addressing girl children and can be translated as "sweet Child."
Honey Farm, The - The Honey Farm just inland from Newquay in Wales is well worth a visit. Apart from their exhibition on bees and bee keeping with interactive stuff for kids and adults, there are tours of the meadery, picnic areas and a cafe and shop. The honey products sold in the shop are all great. You will probably be surprised at how many varieties of mead they produce. The cafe is very good but a little too dear for my budget (especially after spending £100 on mead, honey and one or two other things).
Honey Fudge - A fudge made with honey instead of sugar. Highly addictive if you have a sweet tooth.
Honey Ice Cream - I do not know how good elsewhere but buy it from a shop on the quayside at Aberaron in Wales and you will find it is fantastic from there.
Honey Mead - My favorite mead sold usually as a sweet and not so sweet version.
Horsemen - Folk who ride horses :: The true horsemen of the apocalypse are probably four in number and are bankers, lawyers, politicians and priests, all greedy control freaks who are raping the world and its people.
I
I - The most self centered letter of the alphabet.
Icon - The original meaning was a religious symbol. Later just symbol (as a computor icon for example) and now we have people who are supposed icons - mainly thanks to the media and commentators needing impressive ways of saying things ("She is an icon of the age!"). Funny thing is that many of the old religious icons have become objects that are worshipped themselves.
Indeed - The most useful word to use in almost any situation where you don't know what to say. Means without a doubt.
Ironing - Probably one of my least favorite jobs of all those that have to be done frequently. Washing, cooking, washing up even, cleaning shoes, mowing the lawn, hoovering, washing the kitchen floor - those are all fine. Ironing? Bah! Drat!
J
Ja Ja Binks - Why does no one like this Star Wars character?
John - a first name. For some reason used by Americans to mean toilet!
Juridical - of or relating to law. Juridical days, for example, are days upon which law courts are in session. Jurisdiction - the right or power to administer justice. Jurisconsultant - a person qualified to advise on legal matters. Jurisprudance (not lawology, legalology nor even justology) - the science and philosophy of law. Jurist - person versed in the science of law and NOT a member of a jury. Juristic Act - a proceeding designed to have a legal effect.

Jury - a group of twelve people sworn to deliver a just verdict on a case in a court of law. Juror (also Juryman) - a member of a jury. Jury Box - an enclosure where a jury sit in court. Jury Process - the writ used to summon a jury.

Jus canonicum - canon law; Jus civile - civil law (of a state or region); Jus divinum - divine law; Jus gentium - rules and laws common to all nations. Jus naturale - natural law, a system of law based simply on right and wrong. Jus sanguinis - principle that a person's nationality at birth is the same as that of their parents. Jus Soli - principle that a person's nationality at birth is dependant upon the territory in which they were borne.
Just - fair or impartial in action or judgement; conforming to high moral standards. Justice - the quality or act of being just; the moral principal that determines fairness of actions. Those two meanings all too often divorced from, Justice - The administration of law according to prescribed and accepted principals. Justice Court - an inferior court presided over by a Justice of the Peace. Justice of the Peace - A lay magistrate appointed by the crown to preserve peace in his area, to trysummarily such cases as are within his jurisdiction and to perform certain administrative duties. Justiceship - a rank or office of justice. Justiciable - capable of being determined by a court of law.
Justify - to prove or see to be just or valid, to vindicate, and, it seems, to make up lots of words starting with 'ju' while sounding like justice to hide the fact that the law and administration of it is merely a tool of the rulers.
K
Ken - To ken something is to know it so the translation of "Ken Dougie?" say, is "Do you know Dougie?" This is used in the central lowlands of Scotland and probably more of that country. It is also the nickname for Kenneth. Fortunately there are few Scots with this name so we do not often hear, "Ken Ken?"
Kerbability - the ability of a (formula one grand prix) car to ride kerbs. A term used by engineers and drivers rather than commentators - for a change.
L
Lam - as in "to go out on a lam" meaning to take a risk. I always wondered, as a kid, why it was risky to ride a lamb - until I tried! Now I know that lam was a local pronunciation of limb - a branch on a tree rather than a leg or an arm!
Lanolin - did you know this was wool fat? I didn't!
Lapability - the ability of a (formula one grand prix) car to put in lap after lap. Along with kerbability, I wonder what the yardarm is?
Lappage - of a (formula one grand prix) racing car or kart being the number of laps put in by a vehicle chassis, engine or combination of both, either in total or over a set period or at a set place. The term was origionally coined by commentators but is now in general use in the garages and is spreading through motor racing.
Larp - or more correctly L. A. R. P. Stands for Live Action Role Play or Live Adventure Role Play. Has given birth to words like larper - a person who larps and larping - doing larp. So really I suppose larp is a noun, a verb (to larp) and an adjective (a larp system).
Leather Jacket - a jacket made of leather. Origionally for protection but also now as fashion garments.
Leatherjacket - cranefly larva.
Linen - As everyone who speaks English knows, linen is a white woven fabric that is good in both hot and cool wather as well as being almost showerproof. Its other main plusses are it is easily colored and pretty hard wearing. However I discovered recently that there are many types of linen like cambric and chiffon (which I thought to be a different material altogether!) I am told that cambric is a fine white linen. Does this mean it is weaker than other linens or that it cannot be colored?
Luck - The chance that happens to a person. Most people have luck. Trouble is it can be bad as well as good. Very few people can depend upon which it is going to be as, if they could do so it would no longer be luck but destiny.
Lunacy - People who go a bit potty in phase with the moon. When I lived in Sheerness and around a full moon there were quite a few people who ran around naked, talked in languages that no one understood, thought they could fly, thought they were invisible, climbed up onto rooftops and howled or tried to poo through letterboxes. I was not one of them. Honest!
Lust - extreme desire. Mostly unfulfilled.
M
Ma - Mother - mainly used by Americans.
Magic - The best definition is, "any force that cannot be explained or understood by science." There are a number of theories about magic: "It does not exist unless performed by the feature entity/prophet/priest of our religion when it is a miracle and not a spell." - any religion."Religions have banned and stamped out magic as sinful when in truth it challenges their creeds." - conspiracy theorists (note that it was recently reported in the papers - early October 2008 - that the earliest reference to Jesus Christ have been found and there he is recorded as being a magician!). "Magic was made up by fairies and anyone who asks them can use it if they are their friends." Heather Seagull, a childhood friend when we were seven. This definition in fact became refined to form the made up magic system as used in Mayfest.
Mayfest LARP - the larp system run by myself and some friends. We have two events a year, Mayfest and Augfest. Family friendly. Events under canvas.
Mead - A wine made of Honey and the only wine I drink. (Hint here for when you would normally give me a bottle of wine!)
Milligan, Spike - My most favorite comedian ever.
Minister - The oldest meaning was a person who shares out things. Later a person who administers things. Kind of combined in a Church Minister who runs the church, tries to run his parish and shares out the teachings of his church. A Minister is also a high up in government who administers a department or doesn't if he has no portfolio. Most government ministers these days take more than share out.
Minster - A small town or large village. Small and large are very variable. I have been told a number of stories about how the word came about. Most of them suggest it is the church's fault.
Mister - A name of respect for a male. Shortened Mr. Used when there is no better title to give a person. For example as kids we called all adult males whose names we did not know (and quite a few whose names we did know) "Mister!" unless they were a teacher, "Sir!" a headmaster, "Headmaster! Sir!" a policeman, "Constable!" or wearing a white churchman's collar, "Reverand!" or "Father!" or a relative, "Uncle!" "Grandfather!" (Mum's dad - he shouted a lot and had a big stick) or "Grandad!" (Dad's dad - he gave us pop and took us to the fair.)
Muck - Dirt in a greasy kind of way. Some believe brass can be found near it.
N
Nanobot - Tiny robot - smaller that the eye can see.
Neo - The name of the cat that lives in the house in Crofton Park. He says meow a lot and is big built. A supposed runt of the litter; he rules the backyard area and kills and eats squirrels as a hobby. He loves sprats (nowadays called whitebait). Also the name of a character in the Matrix series of films.
Not - Unfortunately sounds like knot hence the cat's answer at the top of the page. A word that makes a phrase, clause or sentence negative along with 'No' and 'Nor' - Now two negatives make a positive so three should be a negative but the only use of all three of these words together (no other words between them) is actually positive. There is a puzzle for you.

Neuron - Tiny particle in atomic physics - smaller than the eye can see. Good job really as there are loads of them as parts of eyes.
Nonsense - Litterally something that makes no sense. There are various words that can be translated as nonsense, like codswallop and poppycock but each convey a little as to why they are nonsense. I have yet to come across a word that means nonsense just for fun.
O
Oats - A virile cerial associated with Scotland
Onyx - Variety of chalcedony.
Open Source - used to describe some computing applications or code. What this means is that the code is free for anyone to use. It follows that an open source program is a free program.
Outside - A wonderful place, generally no where as near as bad as parents think, that children should be allowed to explore and develop in.
P
Pa - Father - mainly used by Americans
Panoply - (1) the entire equipment of a warrior (2) an impressive display.
Par - An accepted standard that others of the ilk are measured against hence above or below par.
Paradox - The next statement is true. The last statement is false.
Parapraxis - slip of the tongue and other minor errors supposedly as a result of repression, Freudian slip. Great name for a Roman comedy character!
Peake, Mervin - author of the Gormenghast trilogy among other books. A descriptive writer who created a fantasy envireonment my imagination loved.
Peer - A member of the nobility. A Nobleman. Has social rank of Duke, Marquess, Earl, Viscount or Baron.
Peers - persons of same age, social or advancement level as each other.
Pharmacopoeia - lovely name for a book of drugs. Notice it ends in four different vowels.
Pheromes - Short lived chemical nanobots made and fired off by your body so that the recipient's senses can determine the suitability of your being a mate for them. They contain details of immunities and allergies and other information that the other body instinctively processes to work out the result of combining with their immunities, allergies, etc. If the likely combination is likely to be an improvement then the messages the body sends around is attraction with view to mating. This works both ways. This is why some folk who get on great are not sexually attracted to each other and some who virtually hate each other find each other amazingly sexually attractive. A possible reason why love should have nothing to do with lust.
Pi - a value that exists but cannot be exactly defined. If a circle has a diameter of 1 then its circumference is pi. The trouble is pi is irrational (cannot be expressed as a fraction) and transcendental (no finite sequence of algebraic operations on integers can reproduce it). Further the value of pi is the same no matter what the size of the circle. Somehow one day, I will tie this into things to make a tardis.
Pie - a circle of pastry with its edges bent up to make a bowl shape with a filling in and another circle of pastry put on top. This is put in an oven and baked. When it is cut up and shared out the pieces are NEVER the same size - a fact that is the fault of pi.
Pink - a colour made by mixing white with red - for some reason associated with love (could that be watered down lust? - see red!) and girls. This is Pink!
Poe - another name for a chamber pot. The name led to some slight mental confusion when I first heard the description po-faced (pronounced poe-faced) as a kid.
Poe, Edgar Allen - author and poet.
Po-faced - short for poker faced. Means to show no expression (and thus give nothing away).
Poppycock - Nonsense - suggests lies.
Pornography - Porn for short - A control mechanism used to control the masses. Mainly invented by Victorians who figured Christianity was on its way out.
Porridge - dish of soaked oats boiled up in water or milk. I read the notes of a Mr MacX who used to buy up harvested oats, package and then sell them onto the shops. Small oats were not popular so were sieved out and, along with the oat dust sold very cheaply to add to pigswill or animal feeds. One day his daughter took some smaller oats and cooked up some porridge and although it had a finer texture it cooked up a lot quicker. This led MacX to experiment. He found if he lightly washed small oats and dried them they would cook up in around four minutes after coming to the boil. He set up a double sieving method and sold these washed smaller oats as 'Four Minute Porridge' and 'Quick Cook Porridge.' He sold these for more that the larger oats. As the race to produce foods that could be prepared very quickly became more intense he worked out metods of sorting the bran from the oat dust and sold the bran as an additive for soups and stews and washed the white dust to prepare as 'Instant Porrige' - selling this for even more. However the larger oats became unpopulare as a result (especially in England). Meanwhile his bran was selling in health shops and in stares offering 'healthy' foods (and 'wealthy' foods) so he started to market the larger oats to these outlets claiming the larger oats were healthier and tastier - while selling these for even more.
Pot - name for a ceramic or earthenware recepticle used mainly for storing foodstuffs. Glassware ones are jars and bottles and plastic ones are bad for you. Also a slang name for a substance that is smoked - this is bad for the mind no matter what those addicted to it say.
Potty - another name for a chamber pot as well as meaning eccentric or a bit mad. Gave rise to the very old joke, "John has curled up under the bed. He is a little potty!"
Preparatory School - known as Prep School - a school for six to thirteen year olds that is meant to prepare them for public school. Subjects taught at the one I went to were, English grammar and English literacy, mathematics (arithmetic, geometry and algebra), history, geography, current affairs, Latin, French, music (singing), physical training and sports (swimming, cricket, football and rugby).
Puck - a round disk that slides across ice. Generally belted about by ice hocky players. Also the name of a fey child in Shakespear's Midsummer Nights Dream.
Q
Quad - A yard bound by four walls forming a rectangle. As a prefix quad means four.
Quads - Four siblings concieved of the same parents, carried in the same womb together and born around the same time. If one was born a bit before midnight on the 1st of January, another born at midnight and the other two after midnight, how many would have their birthday on the 1st of January? Some people worry about such things! The quads don't as long as they all get presents.
Quarter Staff - an ash (usually) staff used mainly for fighting but I have used mine to assist in carrying things, as an emergency tent support, something to lean on and a main prop for the game "What is it?" A tutor who was teaching its use in combat said, "Your staff is a blunt hand held spear as well as a shield and two clubs.".

Quarter Staff Fighting (as a hobby and in history) - The martial art hobby of English Quarter Staff fighting involves two opponents attempting to hit each other in designated locations while not getting hit themselves. A bowt is over when a predetermined number of hits (called strikes)have been made on an opponent. If the number of strikes for each is within the difference of 5% then points are taken into consideration. Each point is worth 1% and they are awarded for tripping, entangling and forcing (back the opponent more than five paces). For any of these moves 1 to 3 points (inclusive) are awarded. These rules applied to the region I competed in and there was only a little difference in the National Championships. Traditionally the quarterstaff was the main training weapon for soldiery on the British Isles because spears and long handled tools could be used as quarterstaffs - most Celts had been trained in their use and spearmen, and later on pikemen, used the lessons learned with the quarterstaff in open or individual combat.
Quondam - of an earlier time of former. As in "My quondam friend." This is nothing to do with cursing, that would be, "My damned friend."
R
Raffle - A name given to a low odds game of chance. The name was probably invented by old Victorian ladies to make gambling seem a legitimate way of raising money for causes.
Rath - Originally an Elven spirit in another friend's larp system but has been adopted into the Mayfest system. He is neutral and has influence over time, space and destiny. Mostly he sorts things out through avatars like Yorath and Who.
Reality - As this differs from person to person and from moment to moment it defies description.
Reality TV - A lie! An impossibility! A collection of untalented programs involving untalented people that involve the viewers through voting - the money made through the telephone voting pays for the program and makes a healthy profit.
Red - a colour - a prime colour in fact - for some reason associated with lust. (so why do they call porn blue?). This is red! However a peson is said to see red when they become so angy they attack anything. OH yes! I have just remembered the area of town known for ladies of the night is often referred to as a red light district.
Reeve - Medieval steward.
Religion - A lot of things but mainly been used to a) control masses of population b) justify wealthy rulers and c) make a few people very rich. Personally I do not buy the line, "Because you cannot prove this, it is true as it is the mystery at the heart of <name of religion>." I read a mailing from a reader of the Metro Newspaper today (8th January 2009) where they asked. "How come an organisation that cannot prove the foundation of their belief can condemn others for being pagans or for not believing in any god at all?" Virtually every religion does this. We could also define religion as an organisation whose existance is based upon beliefs that are unlikely and cannot be proven AND the cause of/excuse for most major wars until greed took over. AND a needed prop for many of humanity.
Rhizome - Rootstock (Not a music ferstival), the big bulbous thing at the bottoms of some plants (like ferns and lillies) underground.
Roll - (1) either a mode of movement or a mode of movement with an uncertain outcome. The latter is often literally applied to dice. (2) miniature bread loaf?
Rotter! - An insult that should be brought back, along with "Cad!" and "Scoundral!"
Ruck - A noisey (generally play) fight or a type of bag worn on the back and supported by the hips.
Runcible Spoon - Being nonsense - the word "runcible" being coined by Edward Lear in a nonsense poem 1871 - it almost makes sense for a fork to be called a spoon but this is indeed a three pronged fork utensile with the two outer prongs being broad and the other sharp and curved. My grandmother had hands that shook a lot and so had one of these to serve up single large things supported by the broad prongs but held in place by the sharp one. I am delighted to have found out not only what it is called but that it has such a wonderful name. I want one!
S
Sap - Blood of a tree or a person easily duped - is there a connection?
Sausage factory - a place that makes sausages but, more importantly, Sausage Factory is the name of a shop in Weymouth that makes loads of different types of sausages and is bloomin' great!
Sex - an act performed between two people initially to begat children but more often because it is well worth the effort, a good way to pass the time and bloomin' fantastic!
Small Print - Writing on a document that would put you off signing the document if you read it and so printed at a size almost impossible to read or requiring an effort to do so. There is an example at the top of this page.
Sound - (1) Not shakey. Strong. Often used in Midland conversations: "That's sound mate!" to mean whatever you have suggested or done is ok. Or (2) "Sound?" a less common way of greeting meaning are you all right? (3) to sound out - to find out if something is OK or which way the land lies.
Spike - as a noun it is a sharp sticky uppy thing often on the tops of walls or railings to deter people from climbing over or on the ends of sticks for sticking into the people that climbed over anyway and as a verb it means to make something unworkable/to alter the state of something to either its or the person using it's detriment/to make someone helpless with laughter (tribute to Spike Milligan). For followers of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Buffy can use a wooden spike to spike Spike.
Squelch - (1) to walk laboriously through soft wet material or with wet shoes making a sucking noise, to make a sucking noise or the squelching noise itself. (2) to flatten, making that noise. (3) to silence as by a crushing retort. I just like the sound of the word!
Squiffy - slightly drunk. A less known use was a nickname for two friends of mine - one a girl because of her mental manner and the other, a fella, because of his haphazard looks.
State Schooling - Schooling provided by the state through the local councils. When I was a kid there were Primary Schools (5 to 7 years), Junior Schools (8 to 10) and then a branching into Secondary, Technical or Grammar School depending upon 11 plus results for 11 to 16 year olds. At 16 a pupil could go to a college - normally for two years - or leave and get a job.
Studio Gibli - Animated film studio that produces some of the best animated 'mangaish' films I have seen. It is my intention to collect them all - which I have now done!
Suck - A way of getting drink through a straw and into the mouth. We gain preperation for this while we are a baby.
Swimming - another activity I enjoy that can best be described as moving through water without drowning. Unfortunately I do not do much swimming as most pools are expensive, so full of chemicals that my eyes burn and/or in dirty buildings. It were better when I were a kid.
T
Taaan - Dwarven drum that gives a beat sound that rhymes with "gold" and is as lively as their songs.
Table Tennis - The only bat and ball game I was ever any good at.
Table Top Role Play - A form of role play where a group of folk sit around a table to play and role dice to decide chance.
Three D (3D) - 3D stands for three dimensional. In the computing and art context I use, virtual models are built and then imported into programs that manipulate them into a scene. This scene can then be rendered into two dimensional pictures from different angles and with the figures being moved around.
Tolkien - In spite of the stuff written about Beowolf and King Arthur, Tolkien is considered to be the father of the sword and sorcery fantasy genre. He wrote The Hobbit and Lord of the Rings and designed the cultures he described in great detail including languages, scripts, songs and poetry. He was a historian that has become more famed for his fantasy history! He also made up the game "Tunnels and Trolls" which is the first recorded fantasy table top role play game.
Tory - There are five meanings given to this word in the Collins English Dictionary: 1) Member of the Conservative Party in Great Britain or Canada. 2) Member of the English political party that opposed the exclusion of James, Duke of York, from the Royal succession (1679-80) and remained the name for those supporting various Conservative interests until the Conservative Party was formed in the 1830's. 3) American supporter of British cause (loyalist). 4) Ultra Conservative or reactionary. 5) Irish Roman Catholic, especially an outlaw, who preyed on English settlers. {Note: the name came from the Irish toraidhe meaning outlaw or the middle Irish toir meaning pursuit.} So at least the Conservative part of the government stays true to Tory ideal of preying on the English and pursuing more wealth for themselves!
Traffic Warden - When I joined the traffic warden service they were that - a service. The issue of a ticket was considered a failure to move the vehicle on. It was only a change in the way we had to work that caused me to leave. In four years and just over eleven months I had issued less than a dozen or so tickets. Then all of a sudden we were told to issue tickets straight away. This meant that in a normal tour of duty we would be issuing between 40 to 60 tickets and having loads of arguments with drivers who were not expecting such unreasonable treatment. So after one day of that I told them where to stick it and resigned.
Truck - An open backed vehicle used to carry loads. Later came to include all manner of articulated lorries especially in America. I do not to this day understand its context in sayings such as, "I hold no truck with that!" meaning that whatever that was it is not believed.
Tuile - Net fabric.
U
Umbra - Region of shadow; region of dreams; alternate realm impinging upon the world that werewolves can enter in the table top game Werewolf the Apocolypse.
University - a place of learning and thus also teaching. Since this process has to be structured a lot of people work there providing support for the students and teaching staff. Further some of these support staff also need help and support so folk are employed to help them.
V
Vat - A sealed container for liquids not to be confused with V.A.T., value added tax, an additional rip off imposed by governments that is, possibly, the most unfair form of tax. Consider: You earn £20 but a quarter (if you are lucky) is taken in income tax. So (when the 20% vat comes in in 2011) another £3 goes in tax when you spend it and if you spend it on tobacco or fuel there is additional taxation hidden in the price before purchase! So you pay out £8 on every £20 you earn! This leaves £12. Hang on! All this tax does not pay for your pension! No you pay national insurance for that - Oh and as the state pension is not enough you better pay out for a private one as well! If you are earning lots and lots of £20s that is affordable but otherwise ..... So Value Added Tax is another way to make the poor poorer.
Vegetarian - Paul, the other guy who rents the house I live in, is a vegetarian. Vegetarians live on vegetables, milk cheese and fruit. I.E. they do not eat meat or fish. Most vegetarians I know spend quite a lot of time ill. I find it quite hard inventing varied vegetarian meals on a low budget but, in trying to do so, have discovered some new favorite meals. I have recently read a medical journal that has found a higher proportion than the norm of vegetarians suffer depression.
Violet 71 Au - A 3d artist and modeller who is also a friend even though she lives in Australia. I got to know her through the 3d-cc bulletin boards. I have used her models in my own 3d work. There is a bathroom suite she made used in Bathroom Slipup for example. Her real name is Becki and she has two sons that she is bringing up on her own.
W
Waffle - Much of this page or a name for a certain type of savory or sweet cake. If you go into a Fatty Arbuckles do have their hot waffles with ice cream, real cream and syrup!
Walking - another pastime of mine. Sounds booring but when you consider it is a mixture of exploring, observation and exercise it sounds less so. I once heard walking described as, "Not making up yer mind which leg to follow." It is different to running as you always have at least one foot on the ground at any time.
Wealth - Not just richness but actually means 'great profusion' or 'in great abundance' (a lot of) but usually only applied to something you would want a lot of. For example one would not say "The poor lad has a wealth of spots."
X
X - It be 'ere! (on treasure maps) or the marked spot.
x - the side to side co-ordinate in 2D and 3D geometry.
Xarx - A Greek name that later emerged as a fantasy monster - Maybe Tolkien did not start it all after all!
Xuck - This word does not exist so, from now, will mean, "a word awaiting a meaning." e.g. The word gruck is a xuck.
Y
Y - a lazy way of writing "Why?" - I blame texting myself.
y - the up and down co-ordinate in 2D and 3D geometry.
Yea - a voting form of "yes!"
Yeah! - An exhuberent form of "yes!"
Yellow - a colour - a prime colour in fact. {If someone knows the frequency - do tell!} For some reason associated with cowardice. For some reason the colour of the team or house I always ended up in no matter what school or club I went to. Mind you I have always been good at running and dodging - especially if someone is after me! This is Yellow! - Yellow is hard to see on a white background.
Yorath - A name of the 'referee' character I play at Mayfest. Some folk just think of me as Yorath. Yorath is a Timelord vaguely controlled by Rath.
Y'reet? - Walsall greeting meaning "Arer you all right?"
Yuk! - 1) An expressive noise to convey distaste. 2) a revolting Yak - meaning given by seven year old who thinks it is funny.
Z
Z - The way to pronounce an X said before a vowell. The symbol for Zorro - usually on a ruined shirt.
z - the back and forward co-ordinate in 3D geometry.
Zero - Point of origin. A value greater than minus anything but less than plus anything. A place that does not exist as there is not anything there but also there is not not anything there so it is a paradox this is born out in maths: Anything + 0 = Anything, Anything - 0 = Anything, Anything * 0 = 0, Anything/0 = infinity. Because zero upsets normal logic it may not be used in proving a case nor can it be helpful in polymorphalising. A mathamatician with the surname of Hertz said, "Zero is the insanity of mathmatics." It is represented by a circle or joined loop (or graph with a line but no nodes) as zero goes nowhere but can be found anywhere.
Ziggy - Name of a certain German Shepherd (dog) that children love and belongs to Andi and was sick in my living room at the start of the year. Probably too much celebrating.
ZZZZZ - a snore. Symbolises sleeping in pictures. Gives rise to the phrase, "Racking up the Z's" meaning getting sleep.